An American in Kelowna – 61 Years of “Mom”-rabilia
Can you imagine living in the same house for 61 years? My Mom, Julia, can.
That’s more than six decades of sleeping in the same master bedroom over the one-car garage. That’s 22,265 days of rinsing dishes in the same kitchen sink and flushing the same commode. That’s going back to the 1950’s when living in the Pittsburgh suburbs meant not all the roads were paved and the milk man delivered his homogenized goodness to the back door.
For goodness sake, Mom still has a rotary phone mounted high on the kitchen wall! It’s an original beauty that works like a charm. Same phone I used as a kid. It’s been there more than 50 years and the Ma Bell folks said to keep it because it’s way better constructed than the brittle units peddled today.
Where do we start? In the Fall of 2015, health issues started snowballing for Mom and it got to the point where she could no longer stay and perform basic functions in her beloved home. We were naïve to think this would never happen. Sister Jane took the much-need step of searching out assisted-living facilities and found a comfortable new location for Mom. Well done, Jane.
In mid-July of 2016, after two years of filling out Immigration papers, making payments, and patiently waiting, my Permanent Resident Card finally arrived. Huge day. Having this card in my wallet meant I was free to travel outside of Canada and re-enter with confidence. Elaine and I seized the moment. We booked flights to the Steel City and got our minds prepped for the job ahead – cleaning out Mom’s house and getting it ready for the real estate market.
Gulp! Once again, we were naïve to think this day would never come. We told Mom our plans and she seemed OK with them. We were wondering what Dad was thinking from high above?
I booked a one-month work-cation at 923 Amaryllis Drive. Before Elaine arrived for the final 19 days of our trip, I slept in my childhood bedroom. Single bed against the wall. Two dressers. One window next to the front porch. It was magical in one sense, but also bittersweet in another because for the first time in my life I was staying at the house and Mom wasn’t physically there.
For the first few days of Week 1 – Jane and I worked outside and pruned bushes, pulled weeds, and mulched. Mom and Dad loved their greenery. Creating curb appeal was paramount. It was stinkin’ hot and humid and I was dripping like a mini-Niagara Falls. No surprise for late July in the Keystone State. Even in the evening when the sun was shaded, humidity hovered like a toasty towelette.
By the end of the week, we put down our hedge clippers and went inside. Oh boy – Mom hadn’t done much purging for years in her three bedrooms and two bathrooms. Closets were full. Dressers were full. Kitchen cabinets were full. You get the picture. Where do we start? I chose downstairs because it was the coolest (in temperature) part of the house.
Then came the tougher questions. What do we save? What do we throw out? Do we have to stage the house with all this furniture? How many large garbage bags do we have and how are we gonna dispose of all of them? Are we gonna hire a Realtor? Are we really gonna have an estate sale and sell family heirlooms? Do we have enough time to make this all happen?
There was no right or wrong way to tackle (Steelers reference) these issues. It was all about grabbing rags and getting real familiar with the smells of Pine Sol, Fantastic, Murphy Oil Soap, Clorox, 409, and Windex. Every wall. Every window. Every carpet and tile floor. Every nook and cranny. Let the Games (Olympics reference) begin and may we all perform at Gold-Medal status.
The basement got a thorough, wall-to-wall wiping like never before in this century. Then I opened the two closets in the back and found them filled with coats, dresses, and suitcases from the Carter and Reagan Administrations. There was even a pre-PETA fox mink stole. What the heck?! These discoveries were a precursor for coming attractions. What we called the fruit cellar was packed with shelves full of Christmas ornaments and everything else that Mom saved and rarely used. Can we really expect to sell all this stuff?
One glorious morning cousins Jay and Pattie showed up armed and ready. Pattie, having sold five houses of family members in the past, had fresh sorting and purging ideas. She was a whirlwind and I just followed behind. Jay was outside using his power washer. He made a HUGE difference washing down the sidewalks, driveway, front porch, and sunroom aluminum siding! Everything looked fresh and inviting. What a score – light the lamp (Penguins reference)! Thanks, Cuz.
While my talented wife was still in Kelowna, I had been filling her in nightly on our progress. In a subtle way, I was also reminding her of our do-it-for-Mom mission. By the time she arrived at Amaryllis, the house wasn’t pretty. We had clothes, open drawers, and knickknacks strewn everywhere. There was no roadmap or connect-the-dots method to this mother-driven madness. Just had to dig in and get it done. No rest for those who volunteered for duty.
Elaine, as expected, brought an extra helping of adrenaline. She was rarin’ to go and brought her organizational ingenuity to the Potoski piles in every room and shelf space. Jane and I witnessed her magic as our massive to-do list got pared in record time.
A couple days later Jay and Pattie returned with a different toolbox. Chores were divided up. Jay and I were tasked with tearing out the carpeting in Mom’s bedroom. The original hardwood flooring was gorgeous and well-protected. Took us a couple hours before every staple and nail was pulled. At the same time, Elaine was cleaning out EVERYTHING in the kitchen while Pattie was making BIG strides in the living and dining rooms. By lunch time, everyone’s progress was top shelf and the house was on the road to being seen by the public.
We hired our former across-the-street neighbor Lynn from Achieve Realty to be our Realtor. She did a comparative market analysis and was pumped to go the extra thousand miles to sell the Potoski pad. We needed to schedule an Open House. We needed to schedule (after three interviews with three candidates) an estate sale. Elaine and I had barely two weeks left in town and we needed goodies sold and potential buyers coming for a long look. We wanted ALL these responsibilities off Jane’s plate.
It all worked out as smoothly as possible. We got the house ready (“ready” being a relative term) for the first Open House on a Sunday afternoon. It was a rush job. Lynn had about 30 people show up – including Realtors and potential buyers. We had an offer within 48 hours. Then came the home inspection. Then came the radon test. Swing and a miss (Pirates reference) on this first pending contract.
The estate sale came on the following weekend and was quite an undertaking. The woman (Sue) we hired to run the show had a cult (that’s what I would call it) following on Facebook and in print. Her loyal lieges started showing up at 7 AM for an 8 AM opening. The first guy in line was looking only for old pens. Dad had lots of pens. This guy was in-and-out in eight minutes. Got his stash and gone.
Seeing family items sold on the spot (the items were all priced and displayed earlier in the week by Sue’s team) was a humbling experience. We were allowed to “hang around” but not get involved in the sales process. My old bedframe and mattress set sold – I watched my childhood walk down the street to another household. By 3 PM – everything shut down. Sue made her cash, we made some green. Per our contract, leftover furniture and household items not sold would be hauled away on Monday by Sue’s cleaning crew.
The cleaning crew showed up on Monday with three people. Three others had not shown up for work. That scared us because we wanted everything DONE by 4 PM. Elaine and I rolled up our metaphorical sleeves and took all the furniture and boxed items out of every main-floor room and put it on the front lawn. Took us about three hours. By lunchtime, more crew showed up and they handled the heavy lifting and sorting into the truck.
A special guest that afternoon was Father Dave from Mom’s church. His parishioners were hosting a garage sale in September and he stopped by with a van to take a parish (God reference) full of goodies to sell on Mom’s behalf. We thought Mom would be thrilled to know she was contributing to her church in a different way than normal. At 3 PM, we said goodbye to Father Dave and the last of the clean-up crew. The house was basically empty. We were done……mostly?! We showered up and went to a beat-the-crowd dinner with Cousin Margie and Jane.
On Tuesday morning, the day Elaine and I were leaving town, we loaded a few leftover pieces (no one wants anything made of particle board?) from the garage onto Mom’s front lawn. A special trash pickup was arranged for Wednesday morning. This would be our final salvo – no clunky items left behind. Mission accomplished…..we hoped?!
What a marvelous accomplishment and workout. Thanks to Enterprise Rent-a-Car for renting us decent wheels. In total, I visited Mom 14 times at her facility in 28 days. Each visit was a memorable and special blessing. It was difficult for Elaine and I to say goodbye on Day 27.
For obvious reasons, I didn’t include every last detail in this blog:
Like when Elaine and I celebrated two years of marriage by visiting the family-friendly downtown Strip District on a Sunday afternoon where we lunched on Polish food and bought lots of black-and-gold souvenirs (Elaine also got a red “Hillary” ball cap). Like when nine of us (including other cousins) went to visit Mom on a Saturday afternoon and spent three hours at her facility re-telling family stories and looking at old photos…..then we all went out together for an early dinner.
Like when longtime best friend Jeff Buirge and wife Barb invited us over to their farm house for a Friday night BBQ dinner and to watch the Olympics’ Opening Ceremonies. Like when Elaine and I went to PNC Park in downtown Pittsburgh on a Tuesday night to watch the Pirates play the Padres (we chowed on Primanti Bros sandwiches for dinner).
Looking back – Mom would be super proud of our team effort. Ditto for Dad. Everyone did stellar work and the house was shiny and immaculate. We finished what we started and left the house move-in ready. We found albums full of black-and-white family photos. I sweated off eight pounds in the process.
We hope a young couple buys the house and treats it well. Moving on is never easy. It’s almost tearful to think that after 61 years none of us who came of age in that house will ever sleep in it again or plant another petunia the back yard. We were blessed in abundant ways.